It’s Wednesday and despite having those Hump Day Blues, I’m just getting my week started. Some systems were down at work for about two weeks, but my amazing staff has overcome that challenge and is plowing away at this mediocre disaster.
Sitting in my office with a cup of instant coffee (desperate times call for desperate measures) I can’t help but think about how much I miss my little peanut.
Having two days off in a row is hard. No matter how much I get mad or upset or lose my patience, I still love being home with him.
But don’t get me wrong…
I love being at work too!
Sometimes it takes me a few minutes or even days to realize what I’m doing wrong. And you know what? Many times I don’t ever realize what’s wrong. This morning I stepped on the scale and reality hit me in the face. It didn’t just hit me! I got whacked in the face, pushed off, and bounced off the wall falling with a thud to the floor just missing the table where I could bump my head. Ok, so it sounds undoubtedly like a tale out of a children’s book, but man did reality hit me. When I saw the number on the scale had moved in the complete opposite direction of where I want it to be I immediately realized I was doing something wrong. So what was it? What was in need of changing?
I Need to Focus on Me
When I got off the scale the first thing I said was, “Something’s gotta change? That’s it!”.
The second thing I said was, “I need to start focusing on me”.
It sounds selfish, and anyone who knows me will say that I am already pretty self-absorbed. But I’m not being a productive type of selfish. I always put my health first. I refuse to do things that will harm my body in the long-term. So why am I not tracking my food and focusing on staying on my plan? Because as self-absorbed as I am, I am not thinking straight.
My priorities can be all out of whack sometimes. The things that circle my mind most frequently revolve around my children. What is The Get Fit Baby getting into right now? Who is going to watch him while I work tomorrow? Is The Get Fit Big Guy making good choices? Oh God! What is that crashing noise?!
Then flip it over to a bunch of miscellaneous things. I need to pay this bill. I won’t have enough money to pay that bill. I need to fix this on my car. Do I really need to do laundry?
With the overflow of additional thoughts the last thing on my mind is what am I going to eat. I think about feeding my kids before I feed myself. When I go to the supermarket I only pick up healthy things. Things I know that I can put together for myself and them that are on plan. But by the time dinner rolls around, exhaustion has set in. I have driven home from work and possibly sat in traffic. Picked up The Get Fit Baby from somewhere (?!?). Headed over to the gym. Looked at the clock it’s 7:40pm. Joyously I cheer that The Get Fit Baby is about to go to sleep very soon, but not without cooking dinner first. So I pick up something fast for him- chicken nuggets, mac & cheese, and make him something to eat. I take a few spoonfuls and let him finish up. Put him off to bed and that’s when the rummaging begins.